I've got 99 struggles...Kid's Bedtime #1

“Time for Bed.....I just need to get a drink of water.  Mom what are we going to have for breakfast…….”  Some parents have a long list of struggles about their kid’s bedtime.   Some sit on the end of their child’s bed.  Some have tried everything from back rubs, singing, telling stories.  Some have just given up and the child is sleeping in the parent’s bed.  For some children, bedtime is a time for fears, the mind to start wandering, and many other reasons why it just becomes difficult to go to sleep.

We will discuss ways to establish a struggle-free bedtime.  This bedtime routine will allow you to become less emotionally reactive by taking charge and setting limits.  As a result of your new found confidence and consistency, you will hold your child responsible for going to bed without a struggle.   

Presenter

Randy Floyd, LSCSW, Founder, Clinical Level Therapist

Randy is the founder of Midwest Anxiety.  He is a Licensed Specialist Clinical Social Worker who is an optimist and passionate about helping people focus on what they can do rather than what they can't do.  He believes that every person is born with unique strengths and that over time life's stressors can blur our abilities.  Randy believes that building a strong therapeutic relationship and tapping into a person's strengths is the most essential components of the therapeutic experience.

This class is > about You and < About your child

Schedule

7:00pm - 7:10pm: Introduction

7:10pm - 7:50pm: Discussion of Bedtime

7:50pm - 7:55pm: Questions & Answers

7:55pm - 8:00pm: Follow up after class

What does your child's bedtime look like?  What are the struggles? What is your response to your child's struggles?

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT)

bedtime Anxiety makes your child...

  1. Thoughts
    1. Zone into all the "what ifs", thoughts become negative. 
    2. Difficult to "relax" 
  2. Feelings
    1. Experience various physiological sensations such as heart palpitations, sweating, headaches, etc.
  3. Behaviors
    1. Can't relax, get out of bed, ask questions, need reassurance, need accommodations such as you being in room, lying in bed, etc.

Create a Bedtime Schedule

  1. Start the process of your child becoming independent of you at bedtime by having them complete bedtime routine without you.
  2. Create schedule that has time and then associated activity.  Have your child self monitor this routine.

Parenting Rules to decrease struggles at bedtime

  1. Be consistent and stay emotionally neutral!  No yelling, threatening, etc.
  2. Encourage to get all the drinks, restroom, needing to put something in back pack before getting in bed.
  3. For repeated questions at bedtime tell your child "you can handle whatever happens".  Don't go to deep with the "what ifs"
  4. Don't decrease your child's anxiety by reassuring, accommodating, or avoiding.
  5. Specify a time that you will leave your child's room.  Transition yourself out of staying in your child's room.
  6. Use a behavioral modification system for when your child is talking, getting out of bed, wanting you to come back in child's room. 
  7. Behavioral Modification- Get a timer.  When your child is talking, getting out of bed, wanting you to come back in room, start timer.  Stop timer when child is quiet, back in bed, you are out of room.  The next day your child owes you the time on the timer.  Your child will owe time by "practicing" in bed being quiet, not getting out of bed.  Your child will do this prior to bedtime with hopes "practicing" will help child self regulate at bedtime. 

Does your child sleep in your bed?  If so, stick around for a plan to get your child to sleep in his/her bed all night ;)

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Limits and Restrictions:

The materials distributed are provided with the understanding that the author and presenters are not engaged in rendering professional services. This is a psychoeducational class and information in the presentations or group discussions by the presenters, facilitators, or participants should not be considered to be medical, psychological, legal, financial, or spiritual counsel. The presentations and written materials are not intended to provide medical, psychological, legal, financial, or spiritual services or counseling. If expert assistance or counseling is needed, the services of a competent professional should be sought. Any opinions, finding, recommendations or conclusions expressed by the author(s) or speaker(s) do not necessarily reflect the views of Midwest Anxiety, LLC.